A widow whose husband died just eight months after a terminalcancerdiagnosis, despite showing no prior "signs", has shared how navigating her grief taught her that "life is for living".
Jemma Hough, 42, from Sharnbrook, northBedfordshire, said her husband Jon had initially dismissed stomach pain and weight gain in March 2024 to middle age or food intolerances.
However, tests in July 2024 revealed he had stage 4 terminal cancer of unknown primary, believed to be centred around the stomach, in July 2024, with doctors giving him only "weeks" to live.
While hischemotherapywas initially like “magic juice”, it soon brought on severe fatigue, nausea and sickness – and in February 2025, doctors said the treatment was no longer effective.
Jon was moved into a hospice for the final weeks of his life before he died on March 24 2025, aged 47, and Jemma made the decision to donate his body for medical research and training atNottingham UniversityHospital.
Speaking about grief, Jemma said: “It’s almost surreal, dream-like, and I think, ‘Was that really me? Was that part of my life? Did I really go through that?’
“That part of my life almost feels like it was a memory, not real… but we don’t know how long we’ve got.
“My husband was only 47 when he passed, he wasn’t old, we didn’t expect it and we didn’t have any signs, so you just don’t know.
“I’ve always been very positive anyway, but it’s made me think, do you know what, life is for living and we’ve got to take all those opportunities.
“I’m fortunate enough to have time now and I want to make sure that I do good with it and enjoy it.”
Jemma first met Jon after starting a role at a golf centre where he worked, aged 16, and they later worked at a pub and lived together as roommates.
They were not “particularly close” at first but, as time went on, they developed an unexpected “connection” and started a relationship around three years later.
She said Jon had a “very dry sense of humour” and was straight-talking but underneath it all, he was “sweet and caring”.
“Personality-wise, we were definitely like chalk and cheese – people wouldn’t have put us together, but it worked,” Jemma said.
“It was almost fate, I think, how it just pulled us together.”
Jon, who had a son from a previous relationship, married Jemma in September 2008 and had three more children together – Yasmin, now 13, William, 10, and Peter, eight.
Born inLiverpool, Jon lovedLiverpoolFC, and he enjoyed poker nights with friends and keeping active by playing football and golf.
Jemma said Jon had never suffered any major health problems but when he started complaining of stomach pain in March 2024, the couple decided to seek medical advice.
“He didn’t have any signs (of cancer) whatsoever,” Jemma said.
“He’d put on some weight, but he was getting to middle age, so we just thought maybe we need to rein it in and look at diets and be healthier.
“But really, there was nothing that was ‘telling’ until he started getting some stomach pain.”
Jon had blood and stool samples taken for further testing but Jemma said the results came back as normal, and the pair therefore thought his stomach pain might be due to food intolerances.
He then had a scan, which revealed fluid on his stomach, but Jemma said doctors told them “cancer was very unlikely”.
After an endoscopy – a test to look inside the body – and a biopsy, however, the couple were called in for an appointment and told Jon had cancer.
A PET scan then revealed the specific diagnosis of stage 4 terminal cancer of unknown primary, believed to be centred around the stomach, in July 2024.
“It was a surreal moment because we were sitting in there and you see your partner just broken in that moment, then you’re broken, but then you automatically turn into a supporter,” she said.
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“I was just hugging Jon and, at that point, we didn’t know exactly the severity of his condition, but there was a discussion about timings.
“They said, if he responds well to chemotherapy he could go on, but if he doesn’t, it could be weeks, a month.”
Jemma said there were many “unknowns” at this point but he started chemotherapy a couple of weeks later and it was like “magic juice” initially, giving him a newfound burst of energy.
However, as time went on, he started suffering from severe nausea and vomiting, meaning he had to carry a syringe driver with him which “constantly pumped anti-sickness drugs” into his body.
“It was extremely tough because he was just constantly sick and then didn’t want to eat anything,” she said.
During this time, a friend launched a GoFundMe page, raising around £6,000 to help the family create special memories, including a trip toLiverpool’s Anfield stadium to watch a football match with VIP seats.
The family then saw The Lion King at the theatre in London – a show Jemma had “always wanted” to see – and the Ruth Strauss Foundation charity supported them in visiting the Harry Potter Warner Bros Studio.
This was their last outing together before Jon’s health deteriorated significantly after Christmas.
Jemma said: “It’s strange because, in the back of your mind, you’re thinking this is the last Christmas we’re going to have together, or with everything you do, this might be the last time we do this together.”
In January 2025, Jemma said that Jon told her he felt like a “burden” with his fatigue, nausea and sickness and he was “mentally checked out”.
Then, after his birthday at the end of February, doctors said the chemotherapy was no longer working, so he stopped treatment.
“Jon was devastated,” Jemma said.
“He started off saying, ‘We can fight this, we’ll see what we can do with this and I’ll keep going as long as I can’, so he was in that mindset for a while.
“But, as time progressed, he was just exhausted and he’d had enough near the end.”
Not long after this, Jon moved into Sue Ryder St John’s Hospice in Moggerhanger,Bedfordshire, for the last month of his life, a decision made to protect the children from seeing his condition worsen.
Jon died on March 24 2025, aged 47, and Jemma said telling their children was “heartbreaking”, with William “howling” when hearing the news.
“I just came home, sat on the sofa, had a good cry and lit some candles, and just had space to absorb everything and what we’ve been through,” Jemma said.
“Then the grief after that just comes in waves – it hits you when you least expect it.”
During Jon’s treatment, Jemma accessed counselling through the Ruth Strauss Foundation, attending regular sessions with Jules.
She was also connected with others in similar situations through video calls, with the group later setting up their own WhatsApp group to support each other.
Jemma described Jules as her “guardian angel” and said Jules even suggested the children take teddies to the hospice when saying goodbye to Jon and ask him to cuddle them, so they will always have “daddy cuddles”.
“I was really fortunate that we found the Ruth Strauss Foundation because that was amazing support,” she said.
Jemma held a celebration-of-life party for Jon in May 2025 and is now navigating a “whole new world” as a single parent and widow.
However, with her new perspective on life, she wants to encourage more open conversations around grief and remind others to seize every opportunity.
“It has given me a big sense of gratitude and that opportunities are not to be wasted,” she said.
The Ruth Strauss Foundation offers resources and support, including one-on-one counselling, peer support groups, and online materials to help families navigate an incurable cancer diagnosis.
To find out more, visit its website atwww.ruthstraussfoundation.com.
